Honeymoon Outtakes (in which I sacrifice my dignity for your entertainment)

October 18, 2012 by Anne 16 Comments

Ken and I are awkward individuals. It’s a fact we’ve come to accept in each other and in ourselves.

I think it has something to do with the fact that our names are Ken and Anne and we are, in fact, not an 80-year-old couple.

Ken and Anne.

We’ll fit right in when we’re 80.

Anyway, on August 11 we got married. It was splendid. The next day, we embarked on a grand adventure. We road-tripped to Niagara Falls, Vermont, and Boston for our honeymoon.

Most of the time we pretend to be normal individuals and try to mask our awkwardness around others, but pssshhht, when it’s just us? We just let our awkwardness run rampant.

And unfortunately, it is evident in the pictures we took.

Even more unfortunately, I am going to share some of the best (worst?) ones with you here. If you need to sit this one out, feel free.

We’ll start with a sort of normal picture of the two of us. It would be great if we could have actually fit ourselves into the frame of the picture, but I’m still impressed that we took any pictures at all.

We took this while hiking in a place called Devil’s Hole. It was pretty super–it is upstream from Niagara Falls and it’s this deep gorge with rapids at the bottom that we hiked down to. When we got to the bottom, there were no guard rails or anything, which was awesome in theory, but when I almost lost my new husband, I realized it was less awesome.

Here’s the picture I took literally about 2 seconds before Ken slipped on the wet rocks and almost went over the Falls. Almost. Luckily, his natural grace and dexterity saved him and we both remain happily alive and married.

On our honeymoon, we feasted on excellent food every day. I will spare you most of the food pictures, but one night we had the great idea to pose with  our meals to make them more interesting. Again, it would have worked better if we were not so awkward and if either of us had any picture-taking skills whatsoever.

I’m not sure what made us crouch over our food and take such close-ups of each other. Also, it looks like I’m about 5 years old and eating at the adult table for the first time. I honestly don’t know how I scrunched myself that small over my food–I should start doing limbo at the roller rink more often. Perhaps I’ve gained some new crouching skills in my advanced age.

Update: my husband just told me that this picture makes me look like a bobblehead. Thanks, honey.

Ken convinced me we had to golf on our honeymoon, so in the interest of documenting our trip with pictures, he took this good one of me:

and this one, at a waterfall in Vermont (guess I’m trying to hitchhike?):

At least I got this one of him trying to look threatening in Boston.

We’re incapable of taking nice pictures by ourselves. Our wedding pictures are probably the last good pictures we’ll ever have of each other.

That is, until we get our photo taken for the church  directory, which we’ll do in a few weeks. I wonder if the photographer will have me put my hand on Kenny’s shoulder as I stand behind him or vice versa? I have matching outfits planned, so at least we’ll look good no matter how we’re posed.

Don’t worry; I’ll order extra wallet sizes to give to all of you.

If you’re lucky, I’ll even write a nice note on the back.

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